UNITED STATES – In an attempt to look at the bright side of a reality wherein the 45th President of the United States is a man who is likely to change the name of his new home to the “Trump House” and instigate a race war if it will earn him a few cheers, liberals across the country have reportedly started asking themselves how to make the most of a nightmare situation.
“Look, everyone just needs to take it down a notch and look at the pros here,” said one lifelong Democrat who describes himself as a “glass half full kinda guy.” “Maybe an openly racist, misogynistic, childish, narcissistic loose cannon of a US President who has not put forward a viable economic policy to date is just what America needs to become great again. We can’t knock it til we try it.”
“Plus this whole building a wall thing could really work out for us,” said another, who admits that he’s starting to become swayed by Trump’s rhetoric. “Who else is thinking big-ass mural? Sounds pretty great to me.”
Following his 6 state victories on Super Tuesday, reports indicate that many Americans have begun considering the possibility that the Republican front runner is only saying what he has to say to get into power, at which point he’ll realize he’s seriously for real for real the sworn in President of the United States of America and scale it back with all the white power stuff.
“Even if he doesn’t, the four years will be over before we know it.” said a Sanders supporter who pointed out that other candidates “don’t exactly disavow the KKK everyday either.”
“And come on, there’s no way in hell he would ever win a second term. Impossible.”
The Ungrateful Soup 