14 Minutes To Go Before Crying in Front of Girlfriend No Longer Endearing

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During an intense period of open weeping which reportedly grew louder as time wore on, sources who bore witness to a crying, hiccuping man revealed that he had a mere 14 minutes left to go before his girlfriend would start to view the emotional outpouring as kind of lame and embarrassing.

According to reports, girlfriend Charlene Belnavis, 29, was at first excited for the opportunity to share a moment of genuine tenderness and vulnerability with her man, offering him a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, and the comfort and security of a no-judgement woman who understood that men cry too.

However, the situation reportedly took a turn for the worse when her boyfriend rubbed some nose-naught on his shirt and began a desperate fit of cry-talking, at which point he was asked with the utmost sensitivity to “keep it down.”

“It’s so sweet that he feels close enough to me to bare his soul like this,” said Belnavis as she helped the hysterical, full-grown man up from off the floor. “Would’ve been just as sweet in private though.”

As the couple began to draw the attention of a multitude of shoppers at their local supermarket, Belnavis’ boyfriend managed to suppress his tears for a few precious moments before bursting into a renewed fit of cow-bawling, effectively cutting his time in half.

Belnavis shared that his time was cut further still when she was able to decipher through the blubbering that the source of his distress was some sort of disagreement at work, and not something more along the lines of the death of one of his parents, or his overwhelming love for her.

At press time, Belnavis was seen walking a few feet ahead of her man as she went to get the car.

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