JAMAICA – Newly re-appointed head coach of the Reggae Boyz, Theodore Whitmore, has revealed his foolproof strategy to get the national football team to a FIFA World Cup again, which sources […]
UNITED STATES – Explaining that the position also doubles as an opportunity to recite your last rites, 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick asked today that his kneeling stance during the US national […]
KINGSTON – The Lord Our God came forward today to publicly request that Reverend Al Miller repeat his story about the transportation of convicted drug trafficker Christopher Dudus Coke just […]
KINGSTON – Newly assigned Operations Assistant at the local FBI Office, Delroy ‘Big Money Poppin’ Priestly, who is only available by phone, reportedly raised eyebrows on his first day with a […]
GREGORIAN CALENDAR – Reports have confirmed that Monday, long harassed and despised for returning week after week, was found dead in its studio apartment early this morning with a suicide note […]
KINGSTON – Stating that they were long overdue for a vacation in both offshore tax havens, the PNP has released a statement promising to address the missing funds collected for campaign […]
KINGSTON – An Ananda Alert has been activated for 19-year-old Leighton Ellis-White of class MS32C, group B, who reportedly better be missing since he still hasn’t sent in his part of the […]
Craig Asks: Hey UGS, how do I seamlessly weave this unsolicited dick pic into polite conversation? Great question, Craig. Look, we’ve all been there. You’re talking, she’s laughing, things are going […]
